A man with grace and dignity, befitting a Chaebol
In KBS drama “My Golden Life”, when Roh Myunghee was having dinner with her family, she received news that her daughter Seo Jian aka Choi Eunseok had agreed to return home. She told her family not to disclose her existence to any one as yet. The reason being that Choi Eunseok, not being with the family for years, had to be schooled in grace to fit into the dignity of their chaebol family.
My first instinct was “Jezz, these people are real uppity! They think too much of themselves!”
But having seen how Seo Jian behaved when she finally entered the Choi family home, I think Mother Choi had a point.
Seo Jian has to be schooled in social ettiquettre
Grace and dignity were certainly lacking in Seo Jian! Growing up in a family, even though surrounded by love and affection, she had no idea how to behave socially outside of her comfort zone of friends and family. Her family and friends allowed her to do what she wanted, said what she wanted. She could let her hair down and be who she was. Drinking her daily beer, having arguments and maybe even fist fights and digging into the dumpster to collect trash.
The upperclass are under public scrunity
But, within the formality of a chaebol environment, where a certain level of proper decorum was expected, she would be under the scrutiny of inquisitive and condemning eyes. Her awkward presence, found totally without grace and dignity, would become fodder for gossips and media censure. Not fitting to be a chaebol. And we have seen how the Choi family were so conscious of proper behavior so as not to attract media attention! Even her more relaxed “brother” Choi Dokyung was ever so mindful!
So, she will be a sad case of class vs crass to be schooled in the art of grace and dignity before she can be presented to the world! As they always say, it is easier to change oneself to fit into the world but it is not easy to change the world to fit oneself!
Catch KBS’ weekend drama “My Golden Life” every Saturday and Sunday on KBS 2 at 1955h Korean time! Watch Seo Jian’s transformation from crass to class!
Mother Choi figured her new found daughter does not part muster yet
优雅与尊严
卢明熙是在和家人一起用晚餐时收到她的女儿徐智安，又名崔恩素，同意回家的消息。她告诉家人暂时不要在外透露她的存在。原因是崔恩素多年来不同家人一起生活，需要学习一些优雅的姿态，适应他们财阀家族的尊严才能面对外界。
我的第一反应就是“啊，这些有钱人真的太过分！他们太自大了！”
但，观看徐智安搬进崔家的表现，我想她的看法是正确的。
Seo Jian is considered lacking
徐智安缺乏优雅的姿态和尊严的态度！在一个温馨，被爱围绕着的家庭中长大，朋友和家人是在她的舒适区内。一旦离开这区，她就如离水的鱼儿，完全不能适应。朋友和家人迁就她，让她做她想做的事，说她想说的话，完全由自己所愿，如喝她日常的啤酒，跟人争论，甚至可以打架和挖掘垃圾箱。
但，在一个财阀环境，在某个程度是需要有适当的礼节，预期受到好奇和谴责的眼睛盯着，被审查。她尴尬的存在，完全没有优雅的姿态和尊严的态度，将会成为闲话的饲料。不适合做财阀的成员。我们都看到崔家如何意识到和注重适当的行为，以免吸引媒体的关注！即使是她更放松的“哥哥”崔道京也非常关注！
No grace to even accept an olive branch
所以，她将会是优雅与粗俗的对比，必须受到优雅和尊严的艺术教育之后，才能呈现给世界！
请在星期六和星期日观看KBS 2台在韩国时间1955点播出的周末电视剧“我黄金光辉的人生”！观看徐智安从粗俗到优雅的转变！
Photo Credits – Many thanks! KBS Drama
You might also like
33 Comments
Ah! Same phrase in my mind that Jian has not learned the grace of accepting an olive branch! Her older brother aka CDK went out of the way to make peace and there she goes – not a word of thanks nor a gesture of appreciation; in fact she hastily gave away the well thought out gift of a diamond pendant from CDK, knowing very well he will soon discover it hanging from the kid sister’s neck! There lies the beauty of MGL. Look forward to her transformation in the episodes that follow!
Dot you have watched beyond episode 6 where Jian gave CDK’S pendant away? My KBS world will only reached episode 7 tomorrow night
Well said, well said Nance!
#朴施厚# #我黃金光輝的人生# 看到女主角逐漸要適應新生活，陌生的環境，那份循規蹈矩的嚴謹，真的令人有點透不過氣來。相信對她來說也一定好懷念昔日自由自在的生活。劇情很真實，滿有人性。期待故事接續的發展！
In my opinion SJA would have behaved less awkward if she hadn’t met with the man she hates from the bottom of her heart slightly before her entrance and found out he is supposed to be her elder brother. That moment she regretted her decision! Refusing the olive branch SJA only stayed true to her heart. I wonder how long she will manage to live with the Choi family after watching the preview for episode 9. There are too many odds to weigh up against the advantages. I rather think she will fly to her high school friend and take his offer for a parttime job!
Sorry Wilma. I don’t quite agree with this. SJA showed her awkward behaviour and lack of grace from the very first meeting with her “birth” parents. She does not know what respect means, and it was surprising how much Koreans talk about respectful behaviour especially with elders. She went ahead to eat her fill, not bothering to wait for her elders or asking them to eat. Even eating, her behaviour was not entirely comfortable.CDK did unsettle her, but she would still be awkward even if she didn’t meet him before hand.
Oh dear, I have yet to watch episode 7, 8 and 9. But I might be jumping the gun to agree with Wilma that the pre encounters with CDK did impact on her disposition when she 1st enters Choi’s mansion. Is only natural if such unplesant encounters happened to any of us, bet you and I cannot be fully ourselves when put into Jian’s shoes when she had to be submissive to that Victim on her phone. No argument that Jian wasn’t polished to the standard of the Chaebol’s mannerism, however, to call her disrespectful of others is too big a sentence passed on Jian, so Chai Hua has to voice out to Jian’s defence even before I watched what’s happening in episode after 6. Kekeke. By just referring to the point Nance mentioned about how she ate at the 1st meeting with the Choi’s parents. I don’t agree with Nance that she does not know what respect means. I don’t agree. To Jian, respect comes from her heart. I saw Jian tried calling her father who was absent from house since their last talk before leaving the old family. Failing to reach him, she left him a message to say please keep well. She has everybody in her heart, why again and again this poor girl is misunderstood??? I am baffled.I totally disagree that eating first at that 1st meeting table is disrespect. It was down to the basic human needs of hunger, she was so hungry the day before where she didn’t had much to eat, naturally the next day seeing food on the table and she was told to eat, told to have her breakfast before conversations, so what else does she need to do before diving into the food which then in her eyes were the most attractive thing in front of her. Maslow’s theory of human needs, after flight for safety is to satisfy the body hunger. Eat have energy, then talk. She is a fine example of a good human being. The rest of all these nonsense of pretentious so called protocol, I salute Jian not to be bothered by them. 🙂
We will always disagree on this Nance. I’m just looking from a different angle. I have affinity with SJA’s character and realize the same could happen with me. This drama gives me a lot to think over
Wilma van Zwietering it seems the pattern is established, Wilma and I in our eyes, Jian is doing her best, in her circumstances, we cannot fault her though she is not perfect.
Wilma van Zwietering please read my other long reply to Nance about her experience of being cut to size about the subject of holding to pride. It was under your original comment that you becoming more and more disliking the Chois. In that long reflection, I said my piece why if I were Jian, I would not let CDK ridicule my integrity about being arrogant regarding that 5k or 20k thing.
I’ve read your comment Chai Hua Loke. I feel the same way
“We have our own set of rules here ” tells Dokyung to Jian ,when she moved to the Choi family. Jian can’t understand why her manner, her behaviour, her rules of etiquette, her grace and dignity can affect everyone in her new family. Not only in a chaebol family , like the Choi family, respect for self and others should be essential. A code of good behaviour regarding respect among the members of a family is bound up in trust between them, and if the rules are broken the consequences are sometimes dreadful.That’s why Dokyung insists on her behaviour:”Looking down on me means looking down on us.” Honoring and respecting others is a mater of good behaviour, and Jian must know this. And she lacks a lot of rules of etiquette. I wonder if good behaviour patterns have been reinforced in her behaviour by her natural parents, the Seo family, because common courtesis will become difficult to be improved within her new family. We can’t blame the Choi family with their rules , because even for Jian iit’s important to know how she should be in society, in the family, this being very important for her success and happines throughout her life. I really like to know how receptive is she to all these rules. As Manner matters!
I am in full support of Jian going through ettiqute training. Just like our Australian commoner Mary when married Danish royalty she needed the necessary grooming. I have no qualm about that. Reason i said well said well said ny Nance this article
Pleading for Ji An: Ji An’s universe is her family and the desire for stability and security for it (as it was before the bankruptcy of his father’s business). That’s why all her efforts are directed to this goal. Ji An is interested and desperately wants to get the job. That’s why she is helpful beyond measure and she does everything her bosses ask for, because she realizes that only good professional training is not enough. And that’s why she gets aggressive and rude to CDK, because that accident has impede her from solving a problem for her boss.
Ji An is a girl who does not lack feelings and who knows to be sincere and warm, but she’s too fierce in her desire to succeed in life and too upset by the injustice in the world. And that is why she rush and made mistakes, which she recognizes them when they are clearly revealed and explained (as Do Kyung did). Her honesty will help to change the CDK’s view of it in the future.
The biological family for her is unknown, far different from her world, and neither has no memories of the early childhood, to help her to develop feelings of belonging to it. The rush to move into the new family was not helpful, and she was wrong again.
As for the jewel gift, did not bring him any positive emotion, and should reveal to CDK that Ji An does not value wealth. It’s the good education that she received from his father.
Grace and dignity, the good manners are lacking in JA, because she did not have time for that thoughts. But she is good at teaching ALL her lessons now.
As for the lack of respect at the first meeting with fam. Choi, may be due to the unimaginable surprise; the subconscious can play pranks and can make you react strangely. Because in fam. Seo the children were raised in the spirit of respect and love.
I know you will comment and I am right that you can’t not do so to put in your Skw20,000++ 💰💰➕➕worth of thoughts.
Very fair viewpoints seen and felt through with eyes and heart of compassion and without condemnation of the Choi’s.
I am not writing off Jian; I eagerly await her her transformation and I strongly believe her healing process will be greatly enabled by CDK, formerly her enemy, now her brother. And later her lover and friend?! I have already noted that he is selecting her project as the best of the lot of presentations provided for his review, without realising it’s by her. Exciting time ahead and I will love to follow all these redeeming developments in MGL! 🤗🤗
Dorothy Ooi Daniela Maria Miricescu @chai hua loke @wilma van zwietering I also eagerly await how the story will unfold. I am enjoying very much Writer So’s creativity and thinking. Her pen is certainly powerful to wield such strong and diverse opinions drawing different views from people from different backgrounds, cultures, geographies, and it is refreshing to hear different perspectives! Heated and passionate…but being us, mature and opinionated ladies, we respect one another’s inputs. Me? My view still stands – and so far, I think the relationship between CDK and SJA is threading on pride and prejudice on both sides. It will be most interesting to see how Writer So will make out of it…how far will hell go and what would be the redemption? Hmmm…looking forward to our passionate opinions…keep our minds and spirits up! Fighting!
Dorothy Ooi I didn’t think you or Nance are writing Jian off. I just too puzzled how you both could draw on the 2 strong words of selfish and disrespectful as coming from Jian. 🙂 🙂 I saw none of these two, up to episodes 6. I am particularly surprised Nance took the view that Jian should swallow her pride and accepted the words hurled out to her by CDK regarding her arrogance about the reduced debt to 5k indirectly ridiculed her integrity of being an ingrate to his self proclaimed kindness. I thought all of us the group here are people who cannot stand this type of conditional kindness. That’s the point that I am driving home. Under no circumstances anyone in the world to bend on such looked down by the rich. As I said even if there is no rich mother to ask for help, I would have gone to loan shark to get money to shut this big mouth CDK off. Such kindness is not kindness, is kindness with condemn. 20k vs my righteous character, which is worth more to me, is the question. 🙂
Dorothy Ooi As to the view the Jian will be reformed by her brother. I take my preliminary view that it is CDK who will become a better person because of Jian. Jian has her old family good upbringing and teachings, no pretentions, genuine and a fair person. CDK whose character no doubt has a lot of strength in himself, however up to this point, I see fundamental flaws in him that needed to be reformed, example of his perceived himself to be a kind man, that in the very 1st place, is putting me off, so off, that I could not stand these kind of self righteous thinking of yourself. Jian has no fault in her fundamentals. Her actions may come to you all as too swift and too bold or rash. Yet I salute her for such bravery. What is there to achieve by delaying to go to Chois? What good will that bring. Old father is not letting go. Young sister has not grown up. Hanging on longer in the old family when her mind is made up will drive her crazy. She didn’t want to go, but being persuaded and forced to see the consequences if she doesn’t go, it breaks this girl heart and mind that is her fate, so she took the emotional blow to change her mind completely and said she will go. Next come father and sister trying to shake her already vulnerable and shaken belief, how do you expect her mind to be sane if she prolongs her going? As she also said, think about the new parents, have some considerations for them, they have been seeking for 25 years, how earnest they wanted to be with her, think when you yourself are those parents? It was not a case of these people abandoned her, it was by no fault of these parents, who now found her, is a big thing to these people too. So if the mind is made up to go, to me the earlier the better. You ladies are all saying too quickly going to Choi is wrong move. I don’t see delaying can be the right move. I can only think of the torment that will tear Jian further lingering in the old house. As she said she is going to have 2 families, not the case of abandoing the old. She said that over and over. How come none of you seems to get that? Selfish? Why no one says Jisu is selfish when in comparison of the 2 brothers who saw that going too would be their choice if it were to be them. The younger brother saw Jian kneeled down, the younger brother said I am ok with her going straight away. This should be the attitude to come from Jisu, but when she didn’t, yet you support Jisu and instead concluded Jian is selfish………..Geessssss………i cannot take it, LOL
Chai Hua Loke still going on….Why is it you cannot take it we are entitled to our views just as you are entitled to yours 🤔
Chai Hua Loke For me, Jian was acting in a self righteous manner too. Even up to Ep 6 (and I admit, I can’t really tell which is which episode), while I am sympathetic to her plights and like her strong character, in the course of the interactions with CDK, she was also not fully in the right. The accident was caused by her reckless driving, she totally ignored a signal to stop when someone was hot in pursuit and went straight to conclude that the man was crazy, all the while thinking only of herself with no thoughts for others. She begged for a reduction to KRW 5 m, had to swallow her pride and bow, but totally forgot about her commitment – this was how much the committment meant to her. When she suffered the worst day of her life and felt life was not fair, she just heaped the blame on one person, even when he was there to apologise. That was why he threw that KRW20.7 at her. And in her view, being “forgiven” for money owed and such a large sum is frivolous, no need for thanks…just text me and let me no…no thanks needed! CDK did drive some home truths to her…I don’t think in every way he is right …and sometimes sincere, especially when he keeps on harping at “noblesse oblige”, but Jian has not been very much better either.
Daniela, 🙂 I thought I was a bit too vocal with all my strong defence for Jian, not sure if you read all my earlier comments about Jian in Nance’s earlier article, the 25th Sept one. When I saw your pleading for Jian, gees……..I was relieved that my tv did not show me a totally different version of MGL!!! About the 1st meeting with the Chois, I don’t think it was due to surprise that Jian acted “akwardly” at her eating, at the point that she was told to eat 1st, she hasn’t known what the meeting was all about. To me, Jian has not a streak of pretentions in her bone. She means what she says, she acts what was said. The old mother and new parents did give her consent to eat 1st. If not for her extreme hunger which we all saw the day before, she probably remembered the Korean expectation of asking the seniors at the table to join her or to eat 1st. There again, I wouldn’t bet this is really the case with EVERY Young Korean in their country. Jian was raised by relatively free of traditions type of parents, they lived in Dubai for some years too. I don’t expect Jian to have that letting senior to eat 1st as all time behaviour type of person. To me, Jian is straight forward like my dog Bob, if I say Bob , eat, the dog will eat. The dog which is the proven beings on this earth to have no ill intentions, straight forward living things, the dog will not know when you ask me to eat, you actually expecting me not to eat until you eat.
Chai Hua Loke Again, I differ. SJA worked in Haesung for 2 years under supervision and she was acting “respectful” serving everyone. She knew what it was about. And when you walk into a private room of a posh restaurant and with 2 well dressed persons, you would immediately be alert and careful, no matter how hungry you are. Just my thought.
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 That’s why I said Jian is not a all time bound by tradition type. I can assimilate with her myself. Half this half that. So at extreme times of hunger, she forgets. And if we viewers see this scene and think of her as inadequate, I personally don’t like to support such views because that scene comes across to me that if she remembers these expectations that means she is still relatively ok in her self. But she was rather torn by then, after the previous night.
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 Her driving that caused accident that the moment she was told by CDK how she was the one who caused the accident, she didn’t deny, didn’t fight him, she acknowledged. This is how the natural reaction of a good person. She is not a frequent driver, she doesn’t have a car. She was working doubling hard, and being pressured by his boss to reach boss’s wife. Think about these factors yourself, you too would bound to have caused accidents which you weren’t aware. She was “reckless” in her driving because of being pressured. And thought she could do it by pushing the envelops, if she knew the consequences of her driving of course she wouldn’t have driven like that. This is what I am trying to say, as you seem to attach a label on her as no thoughts no considerations for others as her personality. What I am saying is she is trying her best when she is the one who is always put in the hot soup situation.
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 When you weighed against the news that your parents are not your parents, that your new parents, moreover HS group…. do you think the accident 5k compensation commitment will still stay at the top of your head? I absolutely don’t blame her to skip that, not forgetting the other compensation that was also on her plate, the bitch fight that she was almost charged assault. That damage her hope bitch fight chapter would be deeper in her heart and mind than the commitment to an earlier accident where the man has not inflicted too deep a demand onto her, because that man was so patiently negotiating with her. By the time she realised she didn’t get her permanent job, if I were her, I too, headspace will be filled with why and how and deep in thoughts of the bitch friend, rather than that kind stranger man.
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 For Jian, acting in self righteous manner is the only way to survive. Because she is living with bare minimum of both materials and energy of herself. Only when a person is satisfied their basic needs, until they can be at self actualisation stage of Maslow’s human hierachy of needs, then only a person could cater for other people and do not need to hang dearly for life the inner natural reactions for survival. When your security is being threatened, you do anything to save your life, whatever else embarassing or deemed as not catering to anyone near you, is not important, you save your own life from danger first. When you are hungry, you eat without the need to be bothered by looking akward. When you are poor and tired and lack of time, you have not an extra minute and energy for people or things that keep coming to bug you, in Jian’s case, CDK. CDK is almighty rich, he has the energy and time to tango with this poor girl, so in audiences’ eyes, he was being rudely reciprocrated when he was trying to be kind. But I don’t buy that. CDK has the whole world of resources energy and even more time than Jian to tango with Jian, but Jian clearly hasn’t. If Jian has not acted with self righteousness, Jian will not get my respect. Because Jian has nothing, is her self righteousness that propel her to breathe her next breath. If Jian were to only think of the whole world in her already hot enough boiling soup situations, then Jian is a confirmed weakling, the saying that no one can help you, only yourself. At those days of life of Jian, is only her self righteousness that can save her. 🙂
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 Agree CDK did drives some home truth tino Jian, because CDK is a hyprid on the fence of both a good and not that good human being. I am not saying Jian is perfect, I kept saying Jian has done her best with acceptable strong reasons, in her situations, that when I put myself in her head and her background and her heart, that’s exactly what I would have done every step of the way. Not ideal, but then this world ideal doesn’t exist. What I am looking for is what else can Jian do better in her circumstances. Togehter Jian and CDK will bring to light more life experiences to enrich each other and to make each a better person. This will be the go with MGL, if not I can stop watching it from here. 🙂
Chai Hua Loke Tradition and non traditional, rational and hard vs sensitive and caring, swift vs slow, thoughtful vs thoughtless, reckless vs pushing the envelope, These are all debatable and people will see it in different light again depending on the person’s character, background and upbringing.So I guess we can beg to differ and leave this at that. 🙂
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 No problems at all. Nance. 🙂 but if I were to keep quiet on my views, then that’s not Chai Hua, kekeke In airplane safety, you as a parent will be told to secure your own breathing 1st before you put on your child’s. At crunch time, sensitive to others more important so that I don’t come across as uncaring to others? People speed for all reason. Yes, Jian will no doubt be charged reckless driving in the eyes of the court, but from her situations there and then, she is not mature and experienced enough to conclude that is better safe then never, just as the many young drivers, who will only be toned down with age and experience.
Park Sihoo-ssi 박시후 씨 I need to add this one last viewpoint. Don’t take it that I don’t agree CDK has his right to interpret Jian being arrogant and her flippant (as it comes across to him) since he reduced the debt. I totally could see why and how CDK is pushed to thinking this girl when reduced debt is taking things too lightly. What I am saying is, if I were CDK, I too will hold my view that you are not having much right to say your piece until you pay me the full debt. Absolutely correct for CDK to have that view. However, as a distinguished gentleman and as a rich man who already knew the girl been recently laid off, having these in a gentleman’s mind, if he is a truly distinguished gentleman, you don’t point those truth to a weaker person in front of you. Because to me, I am the type of person who naturally straight away instincts will tell me not to hit the opponent with that point when I myself did have the intention to help her all due to her weaker and poorer situation. Because in life, some truth you cannot say them the way you think is right. Contrary to my often claimed philosophy of be upfront. Only be upfront when you know the upfront thing is not going to cut people’s pride. I know CDK has the intention to help, that wasn’t totally fake. However the point is CDK’s willingness to help is almost like a practised/or told or taught to act, not something oozing with real kindness out of his heart. I hope to see MGL development where CDK will peel that layer of the need to be kind off him, and feel the need to be kind. When kindness is from feeling and not from the need to act kind, the delivery of his kindness will not leave hurt marks on the recipients who are poor people who have nothing except pride. We must remember this.
Chai Hua Loke Agree one thing – Chai Hua is not Chai Hua if she doesn’t say her piece! Kekeke!
Kekeke….